Previously on rescue me...
my name is Tommy, and, uh,
I'm an alcoholic.
Thanks, Tom.
You're tellin' me that I
Have to put my wife of 31 years
Into a home?
Good-Bye, jerry.
Thank you.
Mm-Hmm.
For a great date.
She loves me, I love her.
Tommy and me, we're renewing
Our vows.
Hey, congratulations.
That's a surprise.
$26,340. You take it, you
Give it to him, he lets you go.
I don't belong to f-Bomb
Anymore. I don't belong to
Anyone.
He took the money?
Yes, sir.
I was completely fooled.
How long did you know her?
Uh, a little over a month.
Said she could buy her way out
If she had enough money to give
To her pimp. I gave her $18,000.
Did she give you a name?
She told me her name was
Candy.
Dad, got a little surprise
For you.
Hey, daddy.
She never E
Deceto her own
Mother's funeral.
She's chang
Come on over here.
Get in the truck!
What happened?
Get in the truck! Now!
You can't keep your eye onyour own so
Bike down the goddamn block.
I told him to go inside and
Get his helmet.
Yeah, but you didn't check to
Make sure he did, Tommy.
You can't blame Tommy. There
Was nothing that he could have
Done.
You don't know that.
We got the guy, Tommy. Turns
Out this guy, he's had like 5
D.U.I.S in the last 3 years.
People are tellin' me he's gonna
Skate on this one.
Find out what time the train
Comes in on Friday.
5:30, hoboken, track 5. I'll
Take care of the girls for you.
Let me do it, Tom. Let me do
One good thing. Let me do it for
Connor.
All right, girls, good night.
OK.
Daddy?
Yes.
Is uncle teddy gonna die
In the electric chair?
No, honey. Uncle teddy did a
Very bad thing, and he's gonna
Be in jail for a very long time,
But nobody's gonna kill him, OK?
OK.
Good night.
Does Connor come and visit
You?
What, honey?
Ams and stuff.
No. Why?
Sometimes hisit
Me in my dreams.
What--What does he say? He's always r
Is Connor in limbo?
No, honey, there's no such
Thing as limbo, OK? No limbo.
So if there's no limbo and
There's no heaven, then where is
He?
He's--He's here, and he's in
Here.
What?
That was really lame, dad.
All right, well, it's--I was
Thinking on my feet. That's all
I had to work with on such short
Notice. Now good night.
Girls, stay where you are!
Here I come, girls!
Uh.
Ahh.
All right. Up and at 'em,
Sunshine.
Oh, man, what, did you piss the
Bed again?
I knew I shouldn't have drunk
Those last five glasses of wine.
Dammit, it's like havin' a
Goddamn baby around the house
Again.
Uh, you should be so lucky.
Yeah, well, watch that shit.
You know--You know how many
Firemen wish they could be in
Jumping ship?H a pain in the
You should be out drinking
And- And banging
Young broads and, hopefully,
Knocking one up so we can get a
Goddamn boy back into this
Family. We need another set of
Balls to keep the Gavin family
Tradition alive in the FDNY.
You know what? You're
Cleaning the sheets this time.
I don't know how to clean
Sheets. I'm a goddamn war hero,
Asshole.
Oh, yea well, get your fat
Goddamn war hero ass into the
Shower right now.
I'm havin' that 83rd
Birthday party, asshole. You'll
Be lucky if I invite you.
* on another day,n, come on,
With these ropes I tied,
Can we do no wrong?
Now we grieve
'Cause now is gone,
Things were good
When we were young,
With my teeth locked down
I can see the blood
Of a thousand men
Who have come and gone,
Now we grieve
'Cause now is gone,
Things were good
When we were young,
Is it safe to say?
Come on, come on,
Was it right to leave?
Come on, come on,
Will I ever learn?
Come on, come on,
Come on, come on *
[Captioning made possible by
Sony pictures television]
Yeah, you know he wants to.
He's, like, hell-Bent on having
This 83rd birthday party. He's
Just driving me nuts with it,
You know what I mean? So I can't
Afford to hire somebody, and,
You know, you two get along, so
I figured...
what's in this for me?
You know what? Let me tell
You something. In a normal
Family situation, you know,
Somebody asking a sister-In-Law
To help out with the paternal
Grandfather would be considered,
Like, you know, run of the mill
Stuff.
Yeah. Here's the thing. In a
Normal family, a chick who
Marries a cousin wouldn't be
Considered a sister-In-Law,
Number one, and when that cousin
Dies...
it does not signal open banging
Season on said sister-In-Law.
Hey, hey! That was a 2-Way
Street, sister.
Really?
Hang on.
Yeah?
Yo, it's me. Yeah, look, I
Talked to Janet, and I got her
List of demands for you.
It took you long enough.
What do you want me to say,
Bro? She hates your guts. I
Mean, just gettin' her not to
Call a lawyer, it took 2 months.
Could we go over this tonight,
Please?
Yeah. I mean, pick a join
Call me back, and, uh, leave the
Address on my voicemail, all
Right?
Yeah, whatever.
Bye. Hello.
Also, listen, I need you totalk to DA
Condoms in his room.
Look, he's almost 18 years
Old. There's porn all over the
Internet, OK? All kinds of
Porn--Hardcore, softcore,
Midgets blowin' sheep. I think
He's probably pretty up to date.
Listen, talk to him while
You're driving 'cause then that
Way, he doesn't feel like he's
Gotta make eye contact with
Sheel, I--I can't do this.
Do you want me to take care
Of the old man?
All right.
Hello?
Hey.
Hey, how ya doin'?
How ya doin'?
I lost another 5 pounds--83
Total.
Wow.
Yeah. This murder one's the
Best goddamn diet I ever been
On.
Uh-Huh. So eddie told me
You're thinkin' of mountin' a
Antidepressant slash food
Allergy slash insanity defense.
Yeah.
Uh-Huh. And exactly what
Foods would you be allergic to?
Every goddamn one of 'em. I
See anything--Meat, doughnuts,
Raisins, I lose my mind. You
Know that.
I didn't know about the
Oh, my God. They're
Insidious.
Right. And the antidepressant
Thing?
Whiskey. Scotch. Pot. Lookit.
I'm just havin' a little fun at
The expense of the system.
Let's face the fac. I did the
Deed, and I'm fine doin' my time
Behind that. Every once in a
While, I feel a little bit
Guilty about pullin' that
Trigger. I just think of the
Other people, kids like Connor,
A dog or two, maybe somebody's
Mom or dad that that shit-Faced
Asshole would've ended up
Killin' if somebody didn't stop
Him. Listen, I'm doin' fine
In here. I did the right thing.
I'm at peace.
All right.
Good. How's your dick?
Out of practice.
Yeah. I know the feelin'. See
Ya next week.
OK.
God damn it, jerry, where the
Hell are my handcuffs? Jesus,are you tak
Could've killed another 5 people
In here already. Come on. Let's
Go.
You all right, Tommy?
Mikey!
Got her, Mike?
Got her, fr
Yeah, I got her.
I got one here.
I see her.
Jerry!
Yep.
You got one?
Yeah.
Get her up. Come on.
I got her.
I got your back.
Oh, hey, look. Wow! Rats.
Oh, great. Jesus, my
Favorite. Wow, and what the hell
Is this?
That ...a former
Turtle.
Ugh! Man, let's get the hell
Out of here. This kind of shit
Skeeves me.
Hey, uh, let me ask you
Something.
What's up?
How do you feel about snakes?
I hate 'em. Why?
Because you're not gonna like
What I'm about to tell ya.
Why, what's up?
Look.
Aah! Ugh! Jesus!
Aah! Aah!
Snakes?
Snakes.
Snake snakes?
Anaconda type snakes, OK?
Holy shit.
Yeah. 20 years on this job,
I've saved everything--Cats,
Dogs, birds, ferrets.
Yeah, don't forget that
Goddamn iguana up on 125th four
Years ago.
Yeah, but you know what?
Snakes--I--That's some real
Satan type bullshit right there.
Snakes and bats--
Steinbrenner--
That's where we draw the
Line, Chief.
What?
You think it's funny,
Chief? Having some legless,
Leathery, um--What's the, uh,
What's the word I'm lookin' for?
Cock. Cock's a good wor
They are like
Big, slimy, legless--
Cocks.
Hey, guys, check it out.
Pretty cool, huh? Rest my case.
Hey, somebody call animal
Control. There's a goddamn
Alligator in the bathtub.
Who knew noah was alive and
Well and livin' up in harlem?
Must be the rents.
Hey, Chief, you know, that
Really wasn't that funny.
Yeah. Side of the mouth
Sarcasm.
Worthy of a snicker, maybe.
Chuckle at best.
I'm laughin' at the
Cigarettes, boys. Enjoy 'em
While you can. I spoke to the
Grinch this mornin'. As of
Tomorrow at 6 A.M. Sharp, he's
Banning all smoking in the
Firehouse.
What?
I'm tellin' ya.
You gotta be shittin' me.
Hey, what's goin' on?
Yeah, did you, uh, you hear
About this smokin' ban?
What? Guys, mayor put that
Law into effect, like, 5 years
Ago. Come on. Get your head out
Of your asses and read a
Newspaper every once in a while.
Jesus! I'm gonna kill him.
Bullshit, Chief. Huh? We can
Fight fires, eat smoke for a
Living, but we can't smoke in
The firehouse.
Yeah, right.
We can suck down square miles
Of the shit, black, white, grey,
Brown, pick a goddamn color, all
Day and night on the job.
Yeah, but we can't smoke a
Harmless little finger like the
Goddamn cancer stick in the
Firehouse.
The key word there, boys, is
Cancer.
Hey, wow, this is really
Weird. You know what? This
Is--You know what this is? This
Is, uh, this is ironic.
No,onic.
Hey, you know what? You--You
Guto pay serious
Attention to what I'm about to
Suggest here because I don't
Know if I've ever felt so
Serious about anything in my
Tomorrow, quit smoking.Suggestat all of
Hey, come on. Hey, hey.
You know what? Hey, I got the
Bowler. I got the bowler in my
Hand, and I'm gonna smash it if
You don't pay attention to me.
Hey, hey, you realize that
That bowler you hold in your
Hands right now is a completely
Irreplaceable antique item that
I personally sought out and
Bought for this very firehouse.
Oh, yeah? I realize--
You told--Wait, wait. You
Told me you bought that for me.
For the house.
Shut up a second, all right?
Jesus! What's the matter with
You guys? Nobody ever listens to
Me around here ever. I was
Tryin' to tell you guys
Somethin'.
Listen, I been datin' this
Chick, all right? This really
Great chick, and she--She likes
Me a lot, OK? She thinks I'm
Funny, and she thinks I'm smart.
Hey, don't look at him.
Don't--You two. Chh...anyway,
The point is, she's been
Badgering me about quitting
Smokin', and you know what? I'm
Gonna do it.
OK? I'm gonna r, so
Maybe--Maybe the big, tough boys
Need to take a good, long, hard
Look at themselves in the
Mirror, and--And think
Their kids and everybody who's
Important to them and do it for
Them. Huh?
So this--This new girlfriend
Of yours obviously is a
Non-Smoking, uh--
Oh, no. No. No. She--She
Okes like a fiend.
But, uh, she wants you to
Quit.
Yeah. Yeah. She's pretty
Adamant about .
And--And the poinof that
Is?
Uh, to prove to her that I
Really care about her. Hello?
Hold on. Hold on here. Hold
On. Money talks and bullshit
Walks. You want to quit smokin',
Everybody throws 50 bucks into
The kitty, all right? First time
You're caught smokin', another
50. Second time, 100, and so on
And so forth, till you're either
Broke or you go crazy and insane
From the nicotine withdrawal.
The end of the month, the last
Man standing takes the whole
Pot. If there's a tie, we draw
Names out of a hat.
So, Chief, when would the
Contest start?
Right now. Cold turkey. No
Gum, no gizmos, nothin'.
How about, like, 3 minutes
From now?
All right. Go!
Hey, Tom, no time like the
Present, huh?
Yeah. Hey, how much you been
Smokin' man?
Oh, yeah, well, you know, I
Because keela's always lecturin'
Me about secondhand smoke and
How it's bad for the kids.
Yeah.
Blah, blah, blah. What about
You?
Well, since my kids left, I
Been a human chimney.
Yeah.
Hey, probie, you know
Anything about this chick
Garrity's been seeing?
Nah. He's been pretty
Tight-Lipped about her. I know
She's older though.
Oh, yeah? How much older?
Like a lot older. She was
Watching Monday night football
The night they announced John
Lennon got shot.
Well, yeah, that was, like
1980, though, right? I mean, she
Could've been, like, 5 years
Old.
She had a bet on the game.
Wow.
Hey, you know, guys, you
Know, I'm not gonna be probie
Much longer. You know, in a few
More wee I'm gonna be a
Full-Fledged firefighter.
Uh-Huh.
Hey, you gonna stay with the
Crew?
Yeah, I hope so.
Yeah, well, then you'll
Always be the probie to us. See
Ya later.
Hey, uh, you wanna get
Together sometime soon and Chase
Some tail, Tom?
Uh, nah...
what about you, probie? You
Down with that?
Frank, I'm gonna be a
Full-Fledged firefighter.
Yeah, whatever. Smoke?
I barely even studied last
Night, and I know I aced it. You
Know the first--
All right, I'll see ya later.
Hey.
Hey. What's up?
Get in.
Somethin' wrong?
Somethin' wrong. I--What,
Your godfather who happens to
Love you very very much, by the
Way, can't come and pick you up
At school without there being
Something wrong?
Something's wrong. Get in. We
Gotta talk.
Pretty cool lookin' thunderbird.
This is about the condoms,
Isn't it?
What?
The whole point of talking
To a teenager about sex while
You're in a moving vehicle is so
That neither one of has to make
Eye contact.
Sorry. I got--I got ya.
Sorry. Sorry.
All right, look, I--I
Purposely left the condoms in a
Drawer that I know she checks.
It was my way of telling her
That I w, you know, sexually
Active.
You are?
Well, what did you think I
Was doin', sellin' them?
I--I didn't--I--I wasn't
Sure.
No. I've been havin' sex for
Months now.
So you don't really need to
Have the sex talk then, right?
Eyes.
Right.
The sex talk? No.
I got plenty of information
From Mrs. Turbody.
Mrs...?
She's my science teacher.
Oh. OK. Cool. Good. All
Right.
This girl that you're ha
You know--
Sex with?
Yeah.
She seems pretty young. I
Mean--
Well, it--She looks a lot
Younger than she is. Mean, she looks lik
Well, she's 38, but, uh, she
Looks like she could pass for--
Wait, wait, wait--Whoa, whoa,
Whoa. Who's 38?
You're making eye contact
Again.
Sorry. Who's 38?
Mrs. Turbody.
Holy shit!
Hey, hey, watch the road,
Man!
Let me get this straight.
I'm bangin' my science
Teacher.
Mrs. Turbody, who's obviously
Married.
No, no. She's widowed,
Actually. That's kinda how we
Connected. Uh, you know, the
Grieving process, the different
Stages of it, blah, blah, blah.
Blah,
Yeah. I got that from you.
Yeah, I know where you got it
From, OK?
What are you so mad about?
I'm not--I'm not angry.
I'm--I'm--I'm concerned, you
Know? Gee, I--Are you OK?
Yeah.
I mean--I mean, mentally,
You--You know, you all right?
Yeah. I'm fine.
'Cause, you know, I--I've
Read about these crazy teacher
Broads, you know, havin' sex
With their students, and, did
She--Did she rape you?
No!
Oh.
Me a little. Well, a, she
Lot, actua
You know, this is--Th
Serious stuff. I mean, this
Could scar you for life.
Yeah, I sure as hell hope so.
No, I mean, you could
Literally end up bein' my age
And still have the--The mental
Images from this, you know, in
The front of your brain.
Seriously?
Yeah.
Whoo! Ha ha! All right!
Gimme 5.
All right, we're goin' back
To the school, and I'm gonna
Talk to Mrs. Peabody.
Turbody.
Whatever.
But I like her.
I'm sure you do. What's not
To like? What the hell? Where
Was Mrs. Turbody when I was in
School? I had sister Mary
Shovelface, you get sharon
Stone. Christ.
Hey.
Hey, hi.
Very French.
I stopped by your place to
Tidy up and bring in the mail,
And I noticed that this came
From the center.
Oh, great. Thanks, rose.
I thought you'd want to see
It right away. You'll be paying
Your first visit to jeannie any
Day now. This might be good
News.
Yeah. Ah...
well?
They're raisin' the rent.
Oh!
The monthly charges.
How much more a month are
They askin
250 bucks.
Ohat's highway
Yeah, tell me about it.
Listen, I got money in the
Bank, money I never use. Let me
Help.
Rose, forget it, huh? So ihave to wor
Overtime tours a month. It's not
Gonna kill me. But thanks.
All right, listen, I gotta
Run to the ladies. Will you
Order me a sea breeze?
Sure, it's on its way.
Yes? Come in.
Mrs. Turbody?
Yes.
Oh, my God.
How can I help you?
I'm, uh--I'm here about my
Godson, Damian Keefe?
Oh, yes. He's a wonderful
Student. Bit of a handful
Sometimes, though.
Mm-Hmm.
He's not taking any of my
Classes this semester.
Oh.
He's taking my daughter's
Science class. She finds him to
Be, apparently, very
Entertaining.
Hmm.
Her classroom is one flight
Up, end of the hall.
OK, thank you.
You're very welcome.
OK.
So let's do another one.
Uh, excuse me?
So that's the chemical
Equation...
I'm lookin' for Mrs. Turbody.
Right here.
You're, uh...
no, no,y. Do you
Want to ask me something?
Um, I'm, uh, Damian Keefe's,
Uh, godfather. That's who I am.
You know what? Why don't you
Take that and go in the other
But I thought you said
I could stay.
Just go.
So you're Damian's godfather,
And...?
And...and, quite frankly,
Missy, I'm pretty disgusted by
The, uh--The...what are you
Writing down?
I'll only discuss this off
School grounds, over drinks in a
Dark, very quiet saloon, Mr...
uh, Tommy. Mr. Tommy, um...
Mr. Tommy?
Yes, Mr. Tommy Gavin.
You're the firefighter.
Right.
He's told me about you.
What did he say?
About the pills and the booze
And the affair you had with his
Mother.
OK. I can explain almost all
Of that.
Call me.
Oh, God.
Well?
We got a situation here.
What are you talkin' about?
You gotta stop foolin' around
Hook 'cause I gotta have some
Time to figure this thing out.
No way, man. I love her.
You love her. You know, every
Time you have, you know...
sex. It called sex.
I know what it'E
If there are some cigarettes in
That glove compartment. I could
Have sworn I left some in here.
Uh...no.
Shit. Ugh! All right, here's
The deal. You ever look, you
Know, behind your mom's TV setthe home E
System, all that stuff is?
You ever look behind there?
No.
OK, if you did, you'd see
That there's a whole, you know,
Gaggle of wires back there and
Connections and stuff, and
There's inputs and there's
Outputs, and it's kind of like
Your interior pleasure center.
Like your brain is wired
Directly to your penis, OK? So,
You know, you got all kinds of
Inputs and outputs. If you put
The wrong input into the wrong
Output, next thing you know,
Your brain is sendin' the wrong
Signal to your dick, and you can
Get completely screwed up, OK?
So it's OK now when you're 18
Years old, and you're bangin' a
Hot, you know, 38-Year-Old Mrs.
Turbody, but then, you know, you
Could turn into a 45-Year-Old
Man--My age--And, you know,
All of a sudden,
You want to bang
70-Year-Old broads, OK? You want
That? Huh?
No.
Huh? You ever see your
Grandmother naked?
Hell, no!
OK, I'm talkin' about seein'
Her naked wantin' to bang
Her. You want that? Now, that's
Completely screwed up. I'm late.
Now you gotta come to my next
Appointment with me. As far as
Your mom's concerned, you are
Sellin' these condoms in school,
Just like you were sellin' those
Drugs. Got it?
Yeah, got it.
All right.
Wait. I can still think about
Mrs. Turbody when I jerk off,
Right?
Let me ask you somethin'. You
Call her Mrs. Turbody when, you
Know, you're foolin' around?
Yeah.
Oh...
what was that?
That was me almost pukin'.
You happy now?
And it's been 3
Months since I've been sober,
And he's just waitin' for me to
Fail! My dad, he's just waitin'
For me to fail. It's just like
He always says...
wow. This place is really
Full of freaks, huh?
Shh, come on.
Sorry.
All I want to do is run
Out and have 3 or 4 martinis injust to k
What's up?
Huh?
What's up?
Huh? No, I just quit smokin'.
Cold turkey?
What do you think?
I'm gonna do it, I swear
To God.
Why? You got some on you?
No.
Huh? Hey, hey, what are you
Doin'? When'd you start smokin'?
I think you left a pack in my
Mom's room about, uh...
all right.
Whoo! Ha ha!
Holly, hold all my calls,
Please.
Hello, Ms. Jones. I'm your
New temp, rex longley.
Rex? That rhymes with
Something. Tell me. How's your
Dictation?
You don't mind if I put my
Foot on your desk, do you?
So, uh, have you given any
More thought to, you know, when
We might, um...
tell Tommy?
Yeah.
No. Look, Sean, I like you.
You're a great guy, and I have a
Ball when I'm out with you, and
In the Sack, you're a blast. But
I'm not lookin' for a serious
Thing.
Yeah. No, no. I know. I
Just--I don't know, it feels
Dirty, you know? Like we're...
what, cheatin' on him? It's
Funny, you know, 'cause every
Guy I've ever banged who was a
Friend of Tommy's has said that
Exact same thing to me at one
Y?Int or another.
Yeah. It's like you're in
Love with him, and I'm your
Mistress.
[Laughi, no,
That's not...that's not it. I
Just--You know, wait a second.
How many of Tommy's friends have
Oh, drop it.
OK.
Because once we get into
Numbers of any kind, then you're
Gonna start thinking and
Worryin' and obsessin', and then
You're not gonna be able to get
It up.
You want me to do that toe thing
Later, right?
Yeah, yeah! Of course.
So shut up and drink.
Right.
Pancho! Hey, can, uh...can we
Get 2--You know what? Make it 4.
4 more, please. Thanks. So, uh,
You quit smokin', right?
Yes.
Good, 'cause I'm gonna go out
And have one.
OK.
No, stay! Good boy.
Hey. What's goin' on?
How you doin'?
Dami?
Johnny?
What's up, dami?
Hey, uh, why don't you sit
Down and grab yourself a coke at
The bar, all right? We got some
Serious stuff we gotta talk
About.
Oh. Divorce shit, right?
Oooh!
Wise ass.
I'll be over there.
Ahem...so what's the story
With this joint?
This place was grandfathered
In as a smoking joint before the
Mayor got his ban in, you know?
I figured you'd like it. You
Could smoke your ass off.
I just quit.
Oh, funny thing. I just
Started again.
Really?
Yeah, I got a lot of pressure
At work, you know?
What the hell is he doin'
Smokin', huh?
It's my fault, apparently.
Yeah. What isn't these days?
Tell me about it. So what do
We got?
So Janet's not gonna go the
Lawyer route, so you don't have
To waste any more of your money.
Like I'd be gettin' my
Regular fee anyway, huh?
So instead, she figured in
Normally what you would've been
Spending if you had hired eddie
Here to represent you.
Yeah?
Yeah. So, Tommy, look, she's
Willing to let you keep the
Apartment, all right? But she
Wants all the kids' clothes,
She wants all the kids'
Furniture, she wants the plasma
TV, and she wants the car,
Obviously. All right?
Uh-Huh.
And she wants you to cover
All of her expenses and the
Costs for the girls.
Uh-Huh.
Look, Tommy, no matter
How yolook at this, you know?
By not goin' through divor
Court, even with my family
Discount, you're savin' a
Shitload of cabbage here.
That's right.
You guys tell her I'm keepin'
The plasma.
That's a smart move.
You know, she figured that'd be
Your first reaction, so she
Ready agreed to that.
Really?
Guess what? Tell her I'm,
Uh...I'm keepin' the master
Bedroom, too. All right?
No?
No.
No?
Look, Tommy, I told her you
Were sick and tired of her not,
You know, returning your calls
Or even taking your calls, so
She's agreed, once you've agreed
To all this tonight, to give you
A 10-Minute face to face
Tomorrow morning, after the kids
Go to school. All right, Tommy,
I'll double check on a time, and
I'll get back to you, all ri
This is total bullshit, you
Know.
No one's more tired of bein'
In the middle of this bullshit
Than me. I drop the kids off at
Your place, I pick 'em up every
Goddamn Sunday night. Then I
Gotta listen to her go on and on
About, "how's the place look? Is
Tommy sleepin' in his bed? How
Does Tommy look? How does dad
Look?" Blah blah friggin' blah!
I'm sick of it.
So she asks about me.
I'm gonna kill him, man.
Sorry.
You know what? Just tell him
About teddy, OK?
All right. The D.A.'S office
Tells me that if he pleads
Guilty, because of extenuating
Circumstances, that they're
Gonna be willing--
Hey, is she seein' someone?
The point being, that you
Need to back me up tomorrow with
Teddy and tell him that this
Whole food allergy slash
Antidepressant--
You tell her I'm seein'
Someone, OK? I'm seein', um...
I'm seein' a
Tom!
I can't take this anymore,
Man. I can't take this.
No, wait, a dancer. A
Ballerina. I'm seein' a
Ballerina. Girls like her hate
Ballerinas, man.
Yeah? Why is that, Tommy?
'Cause they're so, you know,
Bendable.
Yeah.
I gotta go. Thanks, guys.
He's out of his friggin'
Mind, you know that?
Why don't you shut the hell
Up?! Ya--Ya goddamn sleeper
Cell! U.S.A.!
Candy, on dvd: but tell me, what
Else can you put on my desk?
Hey.
So?
I think he's sellin' em.
Really?
Mm-Hmm.
So he's not having...
I so.
That's so sweet!
Yeah.
I hate to say it, but I'm
Glad.
Yeah. Me, too.
So about my dad...
yeah. Um, I was thinking that
I would come over, like, 3 hours
A day? Maybe come at, like,
8:00?
Perfect.
You look good.
You smell good's what I was
Gonna say.
Yeah, I know.
All right.
See ya.
Yep.
So, I leave you in charge,
Now the kid's havin' sex, he's
Smokin', drinkin'.
Whoa, whoa. Who said anything
About drinkin'?
When he was sittin' at the
Bar, he was drinkin', OK? You
Didn't even check on him.
He had a coke.
He had a rum and coke. The
Broad ordered it for him.
Look, you know, when we were
His age--
No, I know. Either one of us
Would have given our left ball
To get blown by a nun, never
Mind be bangin' one. I
Understand. I guess I should be
Proud of my boy.
Yeah, well, I blame the
System, you know what I mean? I
Mean, they get these crazy
Broads in there with these crazy
Agendas. They should
Really--They should run
Background checks on these
People.
Really? That's funny 'cause I
Blame you. Why do you blame me?
'Cause I'm dead, all right?
Who the hell else am I gonna
Blame? Answer this.
Yeah.
Look, your meeting with,
Uh, Janet's set for tomorrow
Morning, 9 A.M., her place.
All right?
Cool. Hey, um...hey, John--
Ahem, uh, just want to say, uh,
You know, I really appreciate
What, uh...you know, everything
You been doin'. Drivin' the kids
Back and forth and, you know,
Checkin' in on her, you know,
For me. I appreciate it. And
Thanks. John?
Do me a favor then?
Yeah, anything.
Blow me.
Ahem. Let he who is
Without sin St
Stone.
Wow. I didn't know Lou was a
Pink floyd fan.
It was green day, asshole.
Wow. That's even more
Impressive.
Hey.
How ya doin'?
Look, I know that you know
About the guy that I've been
Seeing, but I don't think it's
Any of your business, so don't
Ask me any questions.
Is he a chinaman?
Don't screw this up for me.
You came here to talk.
Yeah.
You know, I, uh...I've been over
This in my head so many times in
The last few months. What I did
Was, I responded to what I--This
Is what I do at work, by the
Way. I responded to what I saw.
I saw the way he was on the
Ground, the way his wounds
Looked, OK? I--The best thing to
Do was to take him then, OK? I
Spoke to the guys at the local
Firehouse. They said it would
Have taken at least 5 or 10
Minutes in traffic for them
To arrive, so I did the right
Thing. I did my goddamn best
Under the circumstances.
It wasn't enough.
OK, you came to me and asked
To be taken back in. You asked
Me for a second chance, OK? I
Gave you what you asked for, all
Right? If there's blood on my
Hands, there's blood on your
Hands, too. Till death do us
Part. Remember that? Who said
That? Huh?
So I was psychic. Who knew?
Put the rest on my tab. You know the
To come out of this is that now
I don't have to watch Connor
Grow up and turn out exactly
Like you.
Get out of there! Find
The one down the hall. Anybody
Here?! Hello! Hello!
Lou?
Come on! What do you got,
A problem?
Ready?
Yeah! FDNY! Anybody home?!
Hey, Lou!
There you go.
Hey, sweetheart. Hey. Yeah.
There you go. All right.
Jesus! That was a bitch,
Huh?
I almost puked on the
Third floor.
That's that sausage and
Pepper sandwich comin' back.
No, it was that old b
I saved. She shit her pants on
The way down.
That's why they make
Depends.
Jesus, it's cold for this
Shit, huh? Should make a law
That says you can only burn your
House down in the summer.
Wait, wait. What did you
Say?
I said it's too cold for
This shit. They should make a
Law that says...
you just had...you just had a
Cigarette, didn't you?
What the hell are you talkin'
About?
You just had a cigarette.
I did not. Why would you say
I'll tell you why
Garrity...because this nose, OK?
Is the FDNY's version of a
Connoisseur.
It's true.
It has smelled every possible
Type of smoke that a nose can,
OK? This nose, when it comes to
Smoke, is the be all and the end
All, and you have just smoked...
a parliament.
Oh, man, he's good.
Holy shit.
How didou know what brand
It was?
I saw the same box lyin' on
The ground as he did.
Hey, that's 50 bucks he's
Gotta put in the kitty.
50 this time, 100 the next
Time. That's what the deal is.
It's 100.
I was just talkin' to her.
Hey, man, she's gone.
OK, come on.
Hey, uh, we gotta get her in
The, uh...
hey, buddy.
OK, come on.
Pal--
Shut up!
Tommy.
Back off!
Hey, hey, hey!
Or I'll kill everybody else
Here, too, you got it?
Come on, kid.
[Devil by the stereophonics
Playing]
Do you remember the day
You left?
I remember my last night
Because I heard somethingifying.
* ever dance with the devil,
Baby? Oh, no,
Make my day,
Do you feel lucky? Oh, no,
Tomorrow's another day,
Can you walk on water maybe?
Oh, no,
Turn water into wine?
Can I buy you a drink there,
Lady? Oh, no,
Can you tell me another lie?
So be my devil a
Be my shooting star,
Be my devil angel,
Be my shooting star,
Have I seen you somewhere, baby?
Oh, no,
I need another line,
Are you livin' the dream there,
Lady? Oh, no,
Can I tell you what's inside?
So be my devil angel,
By my shooting star,
Be my devil angel,
Be my shooting star... *